theshadowboxer

...allergies sidelined me today.  I woke up with not only a massive freakin' headache but also feeling quite nauseious and lacking sleep.  So, I indulged my Buzznet addiction while getting my work area at home together.... slowly....

Songs on Rhapsody tonight:

Depeche Mode - Precious

Black Sabbath - Falling of the Edge of the World

Ricky Martin - Perdito Sin Ti

ZZ Top - Sharp Dressed Man

Depeche Mode - Stipped

Rod Stewart - Do Ya' Think I'm Sexy

Enigma - The Landing / T.N.T For The Brain

U2 - Lemon

KISS - Charisma / I Was Made For Lovin' You /  Dirty Livin'

Massive Attack - Antistar

BT - Satelite

...and going...

Precious and fragile things
Need special handling
My God what have we done to you
We always tried to share
The tenderest of care
Now look what we have put you through
 
Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we'd manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give
 
Angels with silver wings
Shouldn't know suffering
I wish I could take the pain for you
If God has a master plan
That only He understands
I hope it's your eyes He's seeing through
 
Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we'd manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give
 
I pray you learn to trust
Have faith in both of us
And keep room in your hearts for two
 
Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we'd manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give

New Depeche Mode... I like it. 

Maria is quite an exceptional person.  She has gone through a loto of things in this life and has still managed to remain a caring, straightforward and vivacious person.  She is Puerto Rican and embodies that island's sense of energy and spice... She's just a good heart. 

When this photo was taken a few weeks back, we discussed her yourngest son's impending marriage.  Maria was telling us how she tried to impart some knowledge of issues and challenges that both Andrew and his future wife would face.  We laughed when she told us how she would remind him of when he told her that he would do things his way but then come back to her in the very same situation she tried to warn him to avoid.  She also knew that this was the way of life, we all have to figure it out.  But, she was cute in the way she would chide him lovingly. 

We talked about many things this day and of her fears of him going to Iraq.  She told me that she had resigned herself to the fact that things will work out the way it is planned.  She had a feeling that he would be okay but you could tell she was concerned inside.  Who wouldn't be?

Andrew at 19 was getting ready to make that big jump into marriage and to leave for Iraq this past Wednesday, the 24th of August.  His farewell part was held last Saturday night.  Sunday morning, both he and his new wife (of about 6 days) got into their SUV and were going to head home.  He was very tired and she told him to go into the back and sleep.  Her and another passenger were in the front.  As fate would have it, she was the one that dozed off.  When she snapped awake, she realized she was all the way in the opposite lane, in a panic, she turned the wheel to fast and the SUV started to flip over.  Andrew was thrown from the vehicle because he was laying across the seats sleeping.  His wife and another passenger were strapped into their seats in the front.  Andrew died while the other two were seriously injured. 

This is the kind of person Maria is.  In shock, I'm sure, when our group from work showed up at the wake...she gushed over us being there.  She hugged me and told me that I "cleaned up well" and laughed at me and told me, we are going to find you someone.  We laughed... she also proposed to do the same for a sweetie we know, Cindy.  Her heart was breaking inside but she was trying to make us feel better. 

We also went to the funeral and I will tell you that I am stunned that this was all happening.  Andrew was dead... we were there while Maria and her family buried him.  I couldn't believe this was happening.  The insects were loud...birds chirping at the grave site.  It was getting louder in my ears... I couln't believe it.  Andrew getting ready to go to war...His mother worrying about his safety... He gets killed at home... where he was supposed to be safe. 

An accident... A senseless accident...  wails of denial, regret and guilt.  Lessons learned in the ultimate worst way. 

Maria grabbed my leg when I walked by the casket before it was lowered.  I was in shock for her.  She approached us as we were leaving... she hugged us.  She made us feel good and we were there to show her our love. 

I did not expect this for her or Andrew.  I'm so sad this happened and I think still in shock at how events just suddenly turned. 

Life is really a gift and then it is gone.  This week was the teacher of many things....

Maria, we love you.

Andrew, rest in peace. 

You will be missed by all who loved you and knew you through your Mom's stories. 

Music Tonight::

VAST - Here, Touched, I'm Dying  (Heck, just about the whole damn first CD)

Depeche Mode - Various Remixes, Stripped

Tears for Fears - Sowing the Seeds of Love, Woman In Chains

Company outing tomorrow  should produce some lovely pictures.  The last time one of our investors took the group out, we promptly ate delicious Italian food and then got massively drunk on wine that was pouring quite freely. 

So, there might be some pictures from the Indiana Dunes tomorrow.  Maybe some fun ones of people drunk or equally funny pics of bored people wishing they were the fuck somewhere else... *-)